Somewhere Someone Spoke

the unbroken silence
just above a whisper
did you call out to me?
or did the rustle of the trees
trick me
into believing
the words, not meant for me

i'm sorry
to have missed you
so wanting was i
once
that a leave or a branch
mistaken for you
would matter at all

Treatise

what, if not everything
could I have given
just to stop this little piece of me dying

every car door
every tread upon these steps that isn't yours
a little piece of me dying

break your own heart
just to prove a point in fruitless maturation
a little piece of me dying

this silent death of our own creation
alone in this world together
just a little peace, now and I'm dying... Again

the sweet goodnight

the words no longer spoken
falling away
to lay gently on the floor
beneath us
where we once stood
face to face
promising the things we could never give

the morning no longer ours
we lie
with this perpetual darkness
between us
like an empty wishing-well
back to back
and stare into the black of the sweet goodnight

drowned
in words i can not utter
deeds
i can not think
fear
in these thoughts
for you

lost
in inaction
gone
and you will never know
escape
will never be mine
for you

the saddest thing

this crushed molten sand image
reflecting back at me
all that i am
each imperfection
highlighted in flourescent reality
clear now to me
like never before
the opening of these eyes to finally see
making all the difference

the stark inescapable self
realized in shadowed brilliance
every hard edge revealed as truth
the softening of these lines betrayed
by time and illusion
leaving nothing to run to or from
the truth displayed undistorted
for the first time in tears and sadness
by my own vision

i bought you flowers once*

that day in the rain
on the Spanish Steps
as i sipped my dark coffee
i remembered you
walking hand in hand
through the open market
ancient on cobblestones
black-cold and dirty
with the tales of so many
who walked before us

purple-bound in tulle
blue and yellow poppies i believe
stamens full of gold
swayed just enough to catch my eye
as you too once did
before your "i do" became "i don't"
and the nimbostratus covered us in gray
like the dust which accumulates
in clusters on this weathered floor
among the dried petals lying there

* for you

wax and wane

i saw you and knew
you were mine despite yourself
evident in the fact that gray
defined my mood, not the colour of the sky
but, the dull glow about you
that brought me here
to face you in this storm
of clouds and sea
lost for an instant
in ourselves, never knowing the other
as we should
yet always able to explain the why
of the why not

burn me a flower

singe the outline
on my skin and mind
like a feathers blaze
indelibly stamped
upon my soul

tell me the smell
of colours is lasting
as my memory of you
turned away as a season
only to become something else

your borders raised and angry
like life itself
remind me i once lived
in the shadows
of colour and light
obscured only by that curl of white smoke

acrid. pungent. sulfur.
this smoldering work
defines the broken peace
of my one true thing
burned, now forever with me

who i told you i was

withholding everything
i told you the truth
you wanted to hear

silver, gold, and bronze
accepted as real
although the tangible

escaped us both
leaving mineralistic deposits
on the path we chose

to our own deception
crusted in its brilliance
brittle in its form

the weight of our own feet
hastened our fall
together through our own deceit

Myopic

what i once saw so clearly
escapes me now as a process
reflecting only distilled refraction
in sepia and shadow

as a fog descending
i'm clouded in the memories
of the once seeing, alive with vision
in color and light

oblivious

anxiously attempting the impossible
convinced beyond all doubt
the treasure lay in wait
for your greedy hands
to grasp for yourself
oblivious to my will

i watched you as you stumbled
thinking everything was fine
always one step ahead
the outcome evident from the beginning
too bright for your own doll eyes
oblivious to the truth

as you approached the end
i offered my hand to catch you
ignored, you insisted you'd made it
knowing all the while
your task was too great to ever succeed
oblivious to all around you

seriously

the sun rose and you were mine
we didn't even speak
the child we bore
was the only flower
in this tangled garden
a purple flower
among the bramble of us

these vines extend the discontent
as wisteria to the trellis
soft, fragrant and pungent
reminding us of the one moment
we came together and understood
that love is momentary
and gardens perpetual

grown and mature, the vine clings
to the trellis we left in disarray
as the flower continues to flourish
and bless us with its sweet scent
even as you turn away
from the pruning required
to make this garden whole

rust

our molecules clash
the wet to dry effect
once nourishing
like aquamarine to the
purple variegated Liriope
now destructive and clinging

a process we ignored
as our eyes grew weary
denying the aging
we lost our focus of the truth
allowing this slow death
our entropy

once our form was frozen
a coated sagging bridge
no longer held the weight of us
as we tumbled unseeing
and unfeeling below
the water which once kept us afloat

Another Army

you approach as if on lightening
the plains resound with you
a distant resonance
preceding your advance
to the next kingdom
of your conquest

east to west you proceed
resistance a fading strategy
as the thunder of your approach
drowns out the living
consuming the landscape
in fire and pitch

no force repels you
and any attempt to is met
by the siege of your attrition
terminal in their effort
futile in theory alone
failing to slow your western advance

why wonder

if the moon does not break the horizon
or the tides refuse to recede
and the cicada cease their chatter
which makes the evening real
if lemmings fail to file behind the one who leads them
does it really matter as life alone proceeds
this minute print we impress never noticing its effect
is it any wonder we wander without cause

temporary

willing for the moment, so fleeting
but dawn will still arrive
and with its brilliant arrival
our love is cast aside

a temporary measure
i've chosen for so long
because the very roots of me
are shallow and not strong

i loved you for the moment
intensity defined
the willingness foreshadowed
by the darkness left inside

the time is but a whisper
of a love left long ago
as any need to fill me
is what i'll never know

invitation to ill

please ignore me as i speak
please release me as i peak
please defer me to your own
please ignore me all alone
please push off me as i try
please discuss me as i sigh
please abuse the trust within
please, another shot at sin

don't allow me anything
don't accept the truth i bring
don't consider me as real
don't reflect the words i feel
don't pretend to understand
don't ignore my contraband
don't deliver me from you
don't expect that you'll be true

abuse the pass i give you
abuse...
abuse the life i lead
abuse...
abuse me for the moment
abuse...
abuse the web i weave
abuse...

echo

the image of sepia caught
does not capture the fire
forever present in the heart
once favor and time have denied
the lyric-less ballad
as plucked on a heart-string
falls echoing at our feet
to remind us all
we, as love, are but moments fleeting

Love for the Sake of Dying

wondering wounded naked and alive
dying as a fruit of the vine, beautiful
it sheds its measure in volumes hollowed
asking no quarter for turning away to die, for you
wondering wounded naked and alive

Scarab

Scarab
self creation my despair
how do you haunt me
buried in the pocket
of an old forgotten bag

Scarab
"he who came forth from the earth"
why do you look through me
purchased like a locket
almost thrown away

Scarab
roll your sun across the sky
oh, you thought you knew me
given in a warm embrace
forever left behind

Khepri
sacred beetle of the Nile
could you ever just forgive me
cardboard lid conceals your face
box hiding you inside